Swedish Hasbeens Slip In Super High Clog

If you were paying attention to New York Fashion Week, or if you were actually there, you saw Karl Lagerfeld for Chanel bring back the wooden clog. The clog was a staple of ’70s fashion, and it seems a lot of ’70s chic—wait, those two words don’t go together. How about ’70s boho-chic? Much better. Anyway, a lot of that stuff is coming back. Flouncy, lacy tunic tops, wide-legged jeans, platform sandals, and denim jackets, which really come and go in nearly every decade. Next thing you know, Martha Stewart will be teaching everyone how to make macramé plant hangers, complete with enormous orange beads, so we can grow our own, uh, completely legal, unsmokeable plants. Yeah. I wonder how much more entertaining Martha’s show would be if she were under the influence? Think she’d loosen up? Yeah, I don’t either. In the meantime, Chanel put a modern twist on the clog by dressing it up with different materials and straps, putting it on a platform, and jacking it up so high it should come with a health hazard warning. Those things are broken ankles waiting to happen. So consider these training clogs so you can get used to walking on hunks of wood before you graduate to the newer ones. Let’s start with a truly traditional one, the Swedish Hasbeens Slip In Super High Clog.

Ok, when they named this clog “super high,” they hadn’t seen the Chanel ones yet. Or maybe they meant something else. After all, these clogs are created using an original ’70s model that was found in an old factory in southern Sweden. How far south Sweden are we talking? I don’t know, but the furthest south part of the country is just a hop over Denmark to get to Amsterdam. Just sayin’. Anyway, you can get your Marcia Brady on with these traditional clogs. First of all, they’re completely handmade. You seldom find that in high quality shoes anymore. The upper is leather, while the sole is all lime-tree wood. The heel is 3.25 inches high, offset by a half-inch platform. It’s available in this red, and in orange, Bordeaux, and cognac. And get this—it’s on sale. Normally $239, it’s just $238.95 right now at Endless.com. Yes, you can save yourself a whole nickel if you act now! Sales like that don’t come along every day, y’know.

Budget Saving Alternative 1

You know I’m not a fan of UGG boots. I’m not even going to waste anymore space talking about how hideous they are, or how ridiculous people look when they wear them with shorts. But because of that, I don’t really go looking for any other UGG shoes. This UGG Abbie clog just jumped out at me. Well, stomped is more like it. Look at those clodhoppers. They could really do some damage if you’re not careful. The Abbie is a little different from a traditional clog, though, in that rather than just a wood sole, UGG added a cushioned footbed covered with lambskin at the heel, and sheepskin at the forefoot. I don’t know whether that’s a good thing or not because I’ve been told that the way your foot has to grip the wooden sole when you walk in clogs is actually good for muscle toning and circulation in the foot and legs. The walking surfaces are also covered with a layer of textured rubber for extra cushion and traction. I like the stud detailing around the top of the platform, too. In addition to this chestnut leather, it also comes in black pudding leather (which looks like brown to me), chocolate leather, black patent leather, black suede, and chestnut suede. Get the Abbie for $130 at Zappos.com.

Budget Saving Alternative 2

Yes, I know these are garden clogs, but I couldn’t resist. They’re also from Sweden, but have a lower profile than the Hasbeens. What I like most, though, is that the Cape Clogs Garden Wooden Swedish Clog comes in more than thirty colors and patterns. Yes, thirty. I like this floral one. It’s pretty and very springy. You’ll find other floral patterns, as well as fun ones like peace signs, a soccer ball, skulls and crossbones, puzzle pieces, and even metallic bronze and silver uppers. These are just too pretty to wear in the garden. You can really add some fun to a spring or summer outfit with any one of these pairs of clogs. The uppers are all leather with a decorative strap. The sole is wood, with a 1.75-inch heel, and half-inch platform with textured rubber on the walking surfaces. Check them out for just $95.95 at Endless.com.